Cloee is now 8 ½ weeks old. Her daily routine seems to be wake up between 7-8 to eat (depending on prior feeding, she usually eats every 3 hours) she stays up for a little bit, sits in the swing and then drifts off to sleep for a little while. Throughout the day she eats every 2 ½ to 3 hours and cat naps all through the day. Sometimes I can get her to sleep in her bed but never for more than an hour and other times I have to calm her by placing her in her bouncer and placing it on top of the washer while the washer and dryer are both going. She cant hold her pacifier for anything but obviously wants it bc she sucks the town out of it and cries when she drops it and is instantly soothed when she has it (when one of us are holding it in her mouth for her). Many days she insists on being held and will cry and scream if not being held and nothing will soothe her except just being held close with the binky between you and her holding it in.
Night time is where my dilemma really starts after her evening feeding usually between 8-10 it takes 2 hours to calm her down. She isn't happy in bed, being held, in the swing, on the washer or anywhere she just is fussy and absolutely has to be held. Pretty much we have found the only way we are getting any sleep at all is to just give in and let her sleep on one of us. Shes happy if she is sleeping on mine or daddys chest. The past 2 weeks she has actually slept for one 5-7 hour stretch. Making it 7-9 hours in between feeding which is GREAT! However its only if she is sleeping on one of us. I have been at my wits end trying to force her to sleep on her own, sleep in her bed, sleep anywhere but on me. Ive been grumpy, irritated, frustrated and have said selfishly said I never ever want another child bc I never want to go through this again. Im too old and I need my sleep! Well today randomly I came to the realization (or had a revelation idk which) to just give in and let things happen naturally! Right now what Cloee needs is mommys unselfish loving comforts and danget that's what im gonna give her. I just refuse to lay my 8 week old baby in her bed and just let her cry till she figures out to just go to sleep. I know lots of people do it and their kids are fine for it but I never let Benjamin cry it out why should I make Cloee? I never even put Benjamin in his own room until he was 6 months old. And when I did he magically started sleeping 10-12 hours straight through and has ever since. Of course it was easier with Benjamin because I didn't actually have to hold him on my chest but he did sleep either next to me in the boppy or in his bassinet right next to me still propped up on his boppy till he started moving more then I started laying him flat. Benjamin also loved to be swaddled, Cloee on the other hand hates it and fights and fights till shes free. She even gets frustrated if I use the little pads that wont let her roll.
With Benjamin I was always worried about what he was doing compared to what everyone and every book said he should be doing. I was worried about him not liking tummy time thinking OMG hes never gonna learn to crawl because he hates being on his stomach. But eventually in his own timing he started loving tummy time and then eventually started crawling. Every baby is different and every baby needs just as much love and attention and spoiling as the prior one. So yea I give in and im gonna quit trying to force it and just let it happen naturally. I will continue to keep letting her take naps in there and daily try to put her in her crib to sleep and try other ways but if they simply won't work im not going to exhaust myself in trying to figure out how to make it happen and just believe that in time its gonna all work out, just the same as it has with Benjamin. So what if I have to hold her for a few more weeks at least shes sleeping at least 5 hours at a time and at least she knows shes safe and loved and not just left alone to figure it out all by herself at less than 3 months old. I am going to cherish the times of getting to hold her to sleep because I know they wont last forever. I remember wishing Benjamin would let me snuggle him when he got more independent. Stages are just that, they are stages they don't last forever, they come and they go and one day I will wake up and wonder where the heck the time has gone and wish for the days when I could just hold her in my arms all night. I know this special time wont last forever and I decided to cherish it while it lasts!