Monday, July 26, 2010

Can I be like her?

I know its not right to want to be someone else... To look at her and say man I wish I was her! I want what she has, I want to do the things she does, I want to dress like her, act like her, cook like her etc... But the woman described in Proverbs 31 is truly a testament of what kind of wife and mother I truly long to be.

Being almost 6 months pregnant with an 8 1/2 month old plus working outside the home 30 hours a week has it's challenges! I tend to try to rush through my days... Get up at the last possible minute, rush to get ready and jet out the door... If I'm lucky I can grab a few mins with Benjamin and Daddy. Get to work only to be doing what seems to be pointless and redundant while waiting and hoping Ben gets a great job opportunity so I don't have to work and can stay home and be a good wife and mother... Then I come home, tired from a long, boring, redundant day spend a few mins with the baby before his nap, then cook dinner (though sometimes daddy cooks too) by the end of dinner I'm exhausted! I just wanna lay down and vedge out. What ends up happening is an endless night of TV, then after putting Benjamin to bed at whats usually 8 or 830 I follow closely behind.
Wasting away the night I look at around at laundry that needs to be done, floors that need to be swept, dishes that need to be cleaned etc and I think Oh I'll do it later!
There comes a point where you just take a close look and realize wow this is not what I envisioned for myself or my family.
Life is full of challenges but I have come to realize that I cant look at caring for my family as a chore or a challenge!
Work is temporary and I wont have to do it forever. But the way I handle my family now will have everlasting impact. In 10 years my husband and children aren't gonna remember every little detail but they will remember how I cared of them and if I spent good quality time with them.
Its funny that I took a look at my moms life and realized she is ALWAYS on the go.. She rarely sits down and vedges, as a matter of fact I don't know that she knows how to. That's because she is a great wife and mother, always has been. She could have worked a 13 hour day and still finds energy to keep care of her husband and house. I used to think dang mom take some time for yourself why are you doing this for your husband can't he do it himself etc. But she had embraced what God had called her to do.
So I had a paradigm shift... It really is time to be a good wife and mother by taking time to care for my family and not just rush through the days, hoping they will soon end but to slow down and cherish each one. Find joy in laundry not bc laundry is fun but you are doing it for your family, take joy in cooking dinner and doing dishes simply bc thats what a good wife and mamma do! Obviously I have to rest because I am pregnant and keeping care of the baby is a must but resting and laziness are soo different! Time to quit being soo lazy and embrace the wondrous job I have been given as a woman and rise up and take care of my Husband, Babies and our house!

Proverbs 12:4 (Amplified Bible)

A virtuous and worthy wife [earnest and strong in character] is a crowning joy to her husband, but she who makes him ashamed is as rottenness in his bones

So this begins a new journey, a time to put down self and flesh and laziness and rise up and be the crowning joy of my family and aspire to be just like the woman listed below...

Proverbs 31:10 Msg
[ Hymn to a Good Wife ] A good woman is hard to find, and worth far more than diamonds. Her husband trusts her without reserve, and never has reason to regret it. Never spiteful, she treats him generously all her life long. She shops around for the best yarns and cottons, and enjoys knitting and sewing. She's like a trading ship that sails to faraway places and brings back exotic surprises. She's up before dawn, preparing breakfast for her family and organizing her day. She looks over a field and buys it, then, with money she's put aside, plants a garden. First thing in the morning, she dresses for work, rolls up her sleeves, eager to get started. She senses the worth of her work, is in no hurry to call it quits for the day. She's skilled in the crafts of home and hearth, diligent in homemaking. She's quick to assist anyone in need, reaches out to help the poor. She doesn't worry about her family when it snows; their winter clothes are all mended and ready to wear. She makes her own clothing, and dresses in colorful linens and silks. Her husband is greatly respected when he deliberates with the city fathers. She designs gowns and sells them, brings the sweaters she knits to the dress shops. Her clothes are well-made and elegant, and she always faces tomorrow with a smile. When she speaks she has something worthwhile to say, and she always says it kindly. She keeps an eye on everyone in her household, and keeps them all busy and productive. Her children respect and bless her; her husband joins in with words of praise: "Many women have done wonderful things, but you've outclassed them all!" Charm can mislead and beauty soon fades. The woman to be admired and praised is the woman who lives in the Fear-of-God. Give her everything she deserves! Festoon her life with praises!


  1. You go girl! We gotta do our duties with joy! We are blessed to be wives and mommies!!!! P.S. I love The Message version of Proverbs 31 the best too!

  2. Aw are simply precious. I LOVE the woman you are growing to become. Keep it up. Hang in there. Some of us moms have learned exactly what you said in your post...the hard way. It is about being with your family. Don't sweat it when there are things to do and you want to play with your family. It's about making memories and spending quality time, not necessarily quality. You are precious and I'm so proud of you! Keep smiling.

  3. Oh, how we all aspire to be like her! :) I know I often feel I fall short on measuring up to her yardstick. Isn't it funny how easily Satan will condemn us for not measuring up, or convince us that we can't so we don't even try?? I think balance is key! :) It is hard to find that balance between spending time with our children, our spouse and attempting to maintain order in our homes; and still managing to rest every once in a while.
    Some things that help me: Keep first things first. I am a wife first, a mother second and a "house cleaner" third. My relationship with my husband comes first, then my relationship with my children.. then I will give the housework my leftovers. (of course, ultimately God is first above all). Although I am one who strives for perfection, I find myself frustrated when I try to attain it. Yes, we want to keep our homes clean, our children fed and laundry washed, but they will remember the time spent with them, much more than they will the time spent "for" them. So, I encourage you as I try myself, to allow the dishes to pile up on occasion. Especially as your children grow. THe time you spend with them is much more important than a spotless house. And aim for balance. Realize your goal is not to be the perfect woman, but to be the best you can. That is the Proverbs 31 woman. :0)


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