'Chocolate was my comfort, cookies were my reward and salty chips were my joy' These words I read in my devotional today and they shook the core of me! Reading what she wrote about food was like I was reading my own words! I wish I could just copy it word for word for you here but it's the 21 day made to crave devotional on you version! It's not long and if you are anything like me it will speak right to the core of you! I've been reading the Made to Crave: 21 Day Challenge Reading Plan at YouVersion.com. You might enjoy it, or one of the many other plans that are available. Check it out.
This past year has been a yoyo struggle for me! I know with everything what I need to do, what I want, but my struggle and my love for crappy food always wins out! I can't tell you how many times I found myself sitting on the couch stressed to the max with a spoon and a tub of icing in my hand bc that's the only thing in the house that was bad! I tried not to buy things I know just make it worse but somewhere there was always something for me to gorge on! I can honestly say in the stress of the last month I've prob gain at least 10 lbs if not 15! I'm afraid to weigh I don't want to know what it says!
Somehow I find myself at the bottom of a bag of chips full of regret and instead of picking myself up and starting over I cover the guilt with more bad food....
In the devotion she said 'I had to get to the point where I realized I relied on food more than I relied on God' then she asked a bold question... 'Is it possible you love and rely on food more than you love and rely on god'
And my honest answer is sadly yes! Sadly and without doubt. How sickening and shockingly true! When I'm stressed, tired, worried, sad, mad, happy, joyful, angry, aggravated, bored.... I rely on the comfort of chips, dr. Pepper, ice cream etc!
I've known it in the back of my head for sometime but to put words to it makes it real!
That statement was sadly true in every since! Of course I love God but like anything when we put it before him we are making it out idol! I have done that for far to long!
At the beginning of every year our church does the 21 day Daniel fast and I knew I wanted to... But at first it was mostly for physical reasons... To lose a few pounds... But while reading about it I knew that the only way to make it though this would be to make it spiritual the way it's intended.... My end goal has always been to lose weight, inches Etc but this time it's different it's about regaining discipline, spiritual discipline and retraining myself to trust in, rely upon and love Jesus on a whole new level.
This past weekend at church we stated a new series called my story and an amazing statement he said was the life we live today is the story we tell tomorrow. He said what's the one thing you can start today to start living the story you want to tell... Not 3 things not 5 or 8 but what's the one thing... And my one thing is simple ... I'm starting the Daniel fast!
In that encompasses a vast array of things but most importantly denying my flesh and trusting in Jesus.
This is only the beginning! Today we shopped and prepared and tomorrow starts the 21 days!
I have made the decision not to weigh myself, not to take measurements or anything of that kind because my goal in this is not to lose weight! My goal is to pray and rely on the Holy Spirit for help! My goal is to get back into the habit of reading His Word daily! My goal is to put my flesh on the back burner and rely on my spirit man who has been weak and deprived for far to long!
I am so excited to start this new story and watch it unfold! I do love God more than food and my story changes now!
I plan to do my best to blog every day through this journey!
If you are in the place I am download the you version bible app and find the made to crave plan and start it! It might just change your life!
I'm blogging from my phone right now but tomorrow I will post the links!
Looking forward to this journey!